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Author Topic:   A Woman's Humor, Enjoy!!!

Posts: 163
From: Riverside, Ca
Registered: Jan 2005

posted 03-18-2005 06:43 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TrishOfStc   Click Here to Email TrishOfStc     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15

years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he

finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him

to a chair. While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed, the convict

gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the

bathroom. While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his wife:

"Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He's

probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I

saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't

complain... do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he

nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous. If he gets angry,

he'll kill us both. Be strong, honey. I love you!"

His wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was

whispering in my ear. He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute, and

asked if we had any Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom.

Be strong honey. I love you, too!"

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Posts: 26813
From: Lyons, IL, USA
Registered: May 99

posted 03-18-2005 07:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Moneymaker   Click Here to Email Moneymaker     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

Alex Denysenko
Co-Administrator and Moderator

NHRA/IHRA/SRA member and licensed Superstock driver
NHRA and IHRA SS/LA & SS/MA National Record Holder '00,'01,'02,'03,'04 &'05
First SS/MA in the TENS!
IHRA division 5 Superstock Champion
Fleet of FoMoCo products including 88 ASC McLaren Mustang #28

The Barry of BarrysGrrl

Quote #1: "I never met a magazine mechanic I liked."
Quote #2: "Make sure brain is in gear before engaging mouth!"
Quote #3: "If you can't run with the big dogs, stay on the porch!"

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Posts: 1087
From: Northern NJ
Registered: Aug 2002

posted 03-18-2005 08:35 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 65darkhorse     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Think HE needs a feather to take a leak ??

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Posts: 600
From: Moreno Valley, California
Registered: Sep 2004

posted 03-18-2005 09:35 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for stc65coupe351w   Click Here to Email stc65coupe351w     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I think he is bypassing the feather and going for the whole chicken

-1974 351w Block Bored .30-1969 351w Heads Fully Ported
-Custom made Ford 9" with 3" Axle Tubes-28 Detroit Locker-3.73 Gears-Shelby Traction Bars
Pics Michael

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Posts: 463
From: Jeffersonville, NY USA
Registered: Mar 2002

posted 03-19-2005 10:22 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for 70boss302   Click Here to Email 70boss302     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Did someone yell...........INCOMING? LOL!!

70 Boss 302, 71 429 Mach1, 86 RX7 GLX
02 Z06 Vette

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Posts: 44935
From: Saco, Maine
Registered: May 99

posted 03-31-2005 09:02 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for SteveLaRiviere   Click Here to Email SteveLaRiviere     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hey, that's a exit only!

'70 Mustang Mach 1 351C 4V/FMX/3.25 Open
'70 Mustang Convertible 250 I6/3 speed/2.79 Open
'72 Mustang Sprint Hardtop 351C 4V/FMX/4.30 Trac Loc
'94 F-150 XL 5.8L/E4OD/3.55 Limited Slip

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69 Sportsroof

Posts: 2124
From: Valley, Alabama, USA
Registered: Mar 2002

posted 03-31-2005 04:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 69 Sportsroof   Click Here to Email 69 Sportsroof     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
As Crystal Gayle would say, "Dont it make my brown eye blue..."

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