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Author Topic:   Sad story of Jeff Gordon
mellowyellow
Gearhead

Posts: 4063
From: So. Fl.
Registered: Aug 2000

posted 03-19-2002 03:39 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mellowyellow     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
An a**hole racer named Jeff Gordon
A** kicked over ol' River Jordan
No more Nookey from Brookey,
He drew a BAD fortune cookie.
Alimony he will be suppordin'!!

A calculatin' bitch name of Brookey
Figured she gave out Solid Gold Nookey!!
Gave it to Jeff up the butt
That conivin' Bitch Slut..
Surely sh*t on his last Oreo cookie!

A calculatin' BITCH name of Brookey,
Figured she gave out Solid Gold Nookey!!,
Man! it really got terse,
Brooke's the Ol' Devil's Curse!
With claws gouging in each winning purse!!!

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71ragtop
Moderator

Posts: 2416
From: Atlanta, GA
Registered: May 99

posted 03-19-2002 11:30 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for 71ragtop   Click Here to Email 71ragtop     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hmmm, let's do the math shall we....

1) How many years were they married?

2) How many times per week did she give it up?

3) Multiply Answer 2 X 52 and you get the number of times per year.

4) Multiply Answer 3 X Answer 1 and you get the total number of times she gave it up in the whole marraige.

5) Divide $10,000,000 by Answer 4 and you get the cost per screw that ol Jeff is paying.

And in the end, he's the SCREWEE instead of the SCREWER!

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Mach1Maniac
Journeyman

Posts: 27
From: Texas
Registered: Feb 2002

posted 03-20-2002 09:31 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mach1Maniac     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Just think of all the Mustangs he could have bought for that money.
Guess that's what he gets for driving a Chebby.

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helping hand
Journeyman

Posts: 52
From: Salem,OR
Registered: Apr 2002

posted 04-30-2002 10:52 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for helping hand     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Saw Tony Stewart on Best Dam Sports show. They asked him about the alimoney and he replied,looking like he was going to catch hell for his words down the road

"She can have the money when she start's driving the car".

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johnmustang
Gearhead

Posts: 1529
From: Vancouver Island , British Columbia , Canada
Registered: Nov 2001

posted 05-01-2002 12:01 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for johnmustang   Click Here to Email johnmustang     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Vagimony is " the screwing you get for the screwing you got " , but , it never turns out equal.

JOHN

------------------
65 2+2 FASTBACK
68 COUPE
87 TAURUS WAGON
98 F150 XLT TRITON V8 4.6, 4 WHEEL DRIVE
Member:Vancouver Island Mustang Association
M&M #1710
MyPhotoPage
MY TRUCK

[This message has been edited by johnmustang (edited 05-01-2002).]

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Moneymaker
Administrator

Posts: 11947
From: Lyons, IL, USA
Registered: May 99

posted 05-01-2002 10:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Moneymaker   Click Here to Email Moneymaker     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I still say that he is gay!

------------------
Alex Denysenko
Co-Administrator and Moderator/ non 65-66 Mustang owner sensitivity co-ordinator

NHRA/IHRA/SRA member
NHRA and IHRA SS/LA National Record Holder '00, '01, & '02
Fleet of FoMoCo products including 88 ASC McLaren Mustang #28
Part time secret agent license #0089
US Class Nationals link

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helping hand
Journeyman

Posts: 52
From: Salem,OR
Registered: Apr 2002

posted 05-01-2002 11:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for helping hand     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I think the reason for the devorce is that Brook caught Jimmy and Jeff "Doing The Nasty" to seal the deal.

Did you hear that Jimmy got Jeffs old "Winning Fontana Car".
Why not Terry or Jerry?

Very interesting indeed...

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mellowyellow
Gearhead

Posts: 4063
From: So. Fl.
Registered: Aug 2000

posted 05-01-2002 11:52 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mellowyellow     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Moneymaker:
I still say that he is gay!



He got a rainbow on the back of his car??????? He oughta meet the cop on The Shield!! LOL!

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Thud
Gearhead

Posts: 847
From: Cumming,Ga.,USofA
Registered: Jun 99

posted 05-06-2002 07:54 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Thud     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by helping hand:
I think the reason for the devorce is that Brook caught Jimmy and Jeff "Doing The Nasty" to seal the deal.

If the story I got from the sports marketing guy is true, this is a probable.

------------------
Laugh at your problems, everybody else does...

Dwayne

M&M Member #18
'94 Lightning #942 of 4007
'70 Mach1
2 '69 Cyclone Spoiler II's
'65 Galaxie 500 + parts car

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mellowyellow
Gearhead

Posts: 4063
From: So. Fl.
Registered: Aug 2000

posted 05-06-2002 03:45 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mellowyellow     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
All he did was leave the wrong color "wet spot" on the bed!!!

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helping hand
Journeyman

Posts: 52
From: Salem,OR
Registered: Apr 2002

posted 05-06-2002 09:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for helping hand     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

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