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  Gearhead Grrls
  Grrls need a bit of advise

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Author Topic:   Grrls need a bit of advise
Southpaw
Gearhead

Posts: 590
From: Lakewood, CO USA
Registered: Jun 99

posted 12-21-2005 12:31 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Southpaw        Reply w/Quote
The ex still pops up every once and a while. I was going out with a friend of mine and just having fun. But on saturday he wanted to talk about where we were at and I agreed. We were supposed to get together after his NASCAR banquet.
Well surprise, he was at a banquet with the ex and gee...day 5 days later no call or reply from the friend, but the ex called to say congrats on moving on. From what I was told by a few people, the friend has told everyone that we are an item.

Why are boys so stupid? What is so hard to understand about I don't need or want a relationship right now...a little busy dealing with my grandpa dying here. And let's see, after 1.Passing around my personal life at the bar and 2.Not returning my call or e-mail timely, can we say not going to happen now?
Am I making a big deal over something small or does this seem perfectly in line?

If all else fails, hopefully I made someone's day by spilling my sad tale and made their problem look like nothing.

Andria

TOPDowNMUSTANG
Gearhead

Posts: 281
From: Kennett Square, PA
Registered: Oct 2005

posted 12-21-2005 02:27 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for TOPDowNMUSTANG        Reply w/Quote
There's a reason they are our ex's. They should be left in the past.

------------------
'73 Convertible, 351C 2V
'91 LX Convertible 5.0
Member: Valley Forge Mustang Club
"The best things in life are free, but the really kick-a** things cost a fortune."
My Site

kwazykat
Moderator

Posts: 8279
From: ...a wonderful place to be.... orange county... NC!!!! M&M member #92 .... a blue-oval GRRL-deluxe.....
Registered: Jun 99

posted 12-21-2005 04:26 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for kwazykat        Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Southpaw:
.... the friend has told everyone ....

ouch.....the telling everyone part really fades their status.....well.... put it this way andria, if they were my friend and they were in any situation and told things they should not have .... i would consider them no longer a friend .... but merely an aquaintance .... someone i would never be compelled to share anything other than "on the surface" stuff..... common knowledge things....... breaching someone's confidence and trust is a big no-no......

the second part is..... if the friend had no clue that what they were telling was bogus or was undermining or would hurt or upset you then the next issue is their lack of connection to your being and to your core self ....... if they do not know you well enough already to know these basic things about you then maybe the friendship deserves a long hard look.....

on the other-other hand if i understand the scenario correctly maybe the friend spends more time with your ex than is healthy as far as someone you are connecting with......

i hope i understood this right .....that your friend was hanging with your ex and was yapping about you to your ex? forgive me if i got it wrong, let me know and i will start over!!

i would be very watchful that the time you spend with the friend does not turn into time that the friend spends telling the ex where you went what you did what you talked about and so forth.....

distance the ex as much as possible
real friends will understand this concept!!!

keep us in the loop....
i know it can be tough....
but we are here to get you thru it all!!!!

kk

capri man
Gearhead

Posts: 8777
From: doerun, ga.
Registered: Nov 2000

posted 12-21-2005 07:42 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for capri man        Reply w/Quote
andria, im not one of the grrls, but!!
you said "Why are boys so stupid?" that might be the problem, find you a man instead of a boy and things might get better!! see you in chat thur! im still trying to figure out how to stalk you!!

------------------
mike r
racing is real
everything else is just a game.
81 capri-302-7.25 @93mph 1/8
1.54 60ft 50 % of the fun dragracing is meeting people who will give you the shirt off their back to wipe the grease off your hands.
M&M member #839 http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y6/mike470/adel2.jpg

Southpaw
Gearhead

Posts: 590
From: Lakewood, CO USA
Registered: Jun 99

posted 12-22-2005 02:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Southpaw        Reply w/Quote
KK-
Sorry, I forgot to add that the ex and my "friend" hung out or hung around each other for over a year now. They see each other at the bar every Wednesday, Saturday or Sunday for Nascar races. Something about sitting at the bar every race watching the car go round and round and round...Guess you need something else to do then drink and get dizzy!
The "friend" wanted to date me, the ex approves, but I really don't need or care for either right now. I had an odd feeling when all this started...and something is still off. I'm glad to know that I should have an issue with this.

The sad part of this all...I think everyone here knows more about me and my life then either of these turkeys.

Mike-
I was waiting for someone to say that!

I know I should feel a little bad about all this, but hell, I just want to relax and not deal with drama! I just needed to vent and get this out...my brain was about to implode!

Much better now!!!
Andria

kwazykat
Moderator

Posts: 8279
From: ...a wonderful place to be.... orange county... NC!!!! M&M member #92 .... a blue-oval GRRL-deluxe.....
Registered: Jun 99

posted 12-22-2005 07:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for kwazykat        Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Southpaw:
......I think everyone here knows more about me and my life then either of these turkeys....


that is because we are your friends and we really do care about you and your sanity!!

now, get ta' relaxin' ... and enjoy your holiday season!!!

kk

Ked
Moderator

Posts: 9683
From: Fayetteville, N.C.
Registered: Jul 99

posted 12-24-2005 01:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ked        Reply w/Quote
I'm probably not a good person to give 'boy' advice.

I mean, who knows? right?

It has been my experience that if you are nice to a boy and smile they think your hot for 'em.

When really in fact, your just trying to be polite.

I agree with my sister about the trust issue. Once that confidence is blown, there is really no way to get it back.

As hard as it is, it might be time to try and find a new circle of friends that do not associate with the ex.

mustangs68
Moderator

Posts: 27681
From: Hampton Va MCA#39406 M&M #12 Member Mustang Club of Tidewater
Registered: May 99

posted 12-26-2005 11:03 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mustangs68        Reply w/Quote
Gal,I've been married so long I don't know Jack

But I have to agree with this:

I agree with my sister about the trust issue. Once that confidence is blown, there is really no way to get it back.

As hard as it is, it might be time to try and find a new circle of friends that do not associate with the ex.


Now go to the local Bowling Center,look cute,which should be little or no problem for you
Look around,find a good looking fellow,without a pitcher of Beer on the Table,no piercing,no dark makeup just a clean cut all American fellow and strike (I made a pun there didn't I)up a conversation

Your way to nice a person to put up with that 13 year old BS,and if I was single...

Sam
an old Fart


kwazykat
Moderator

Posts: 8279
From: ...a wonderful place to be.... orange county... NC!!!! M&M member #92 .... a blue-oval GRRL-deluxe.....
Registered: Jun 99

posted 12-27-2005 08:27 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for kwazykat        Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by mustangs68:
...and if I was single...

there ya go andria!!
you know YOUR cookies are good


be healthy be happy be all about andria!!

kk

capri man
Gearhead

Posts: 8777
From: doerun, ga.
Registered: Nov 2000

posted 12-28-2005 06:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for capri man        Reply w/Quote
whats wrong with the pitcher of beer???

------------------
mike r
racing is real
everything else is just a game.
81 capri-302-7.25 @93mph 1/8
1.54 60ft 50 % of the fun dragracing is meeting people who will give you the shirt off their back to wipe the grease off your hands.
M&M member #839 http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y6/mike470/adel2.jpg

deathtoricers
Gearhead

Posts: 377
From: Ft Bragg NC
Registered: Jun 2005

posted 01-04-2006 10:31 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for deathtoricers        Reply w/Quote
get them both at the bar with all their cockbuddies around and exclaim loudly that they BOTH are useless fecks
if it was me I'd throw in something about them having tiny penises.. but that's me

Ci8UUP
Gearhead

Posts: 631
From: Renton, Washington
Registered: May 2005

posted 01-07-2006 01:23 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ci8UUP        Reply w/Quote
Question: why are you looking in a bar or tavern for someone with some substance?

kwazykat
Moderator

Posts: 8279
From: ...a wonderful place to be.... orange county... NC!!!! M&M member #92 .... a blue-oval GRRL-deluxe.....
Registered: Jun 99

posted 01-07-2006 10:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for kwazykat        Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Ci8UUP:
Question: why are you looking in a bar or tavern for someone with some substance?

oh.... no one is.... sam just mentioned for andria to go to the bowling alley and look for someone WITHOUT a pitcher of beer and the train of thought got trainwrecked from there!

kk

Ci8UUP
Gearhead

Posts: 631
From: Renton, Washington
Registered: May 2005

posted 01-07-2006 09:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ci8UUP        Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by kwazykat:
oh.... no one is.... sam just mentioned for andria to go to the bowling alley and look for someone WITHOUT a pitcher of beer and the train of thought got trainwrecked from there!

kk


She stated: "They see each other at the bar every Wednesday, Saturday or Sunday for Nascar races."
That's where my question originated from. It seems she's wanting to pursue a relationship with guys who hang out in bars. Did I make the wrong assumption here?

kwazykat
Moderator

Posts: 8279
From: ...a wonderful place to be.... orange county... NC!!!! M&M member #92 .... a blue-oval GRRL-deluxe.....
Registered: Jun 99

posted 01-08-2006 11:30 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for kwazykat        Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Ci8UUP:
....Did I make the wrong assumption here?

nah... there were just two main scenarios where the beer/bar stuff was mentioned... use the quote function next time so we know which one is the point of reference! i was looking at point b and you were referring to point a ..... ooops!!!

it seems the character of the two fellas in question is much less than favourable ...... so irregardless of where they hang out they will be scoundrels eh!?

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